shrek. 16. bi. onions. mud. swamps. gross things. fuck lord farquad. fuck humans. fuck fairytale creatures. i dont need anyone but myself. i eat bugs and eyeballs i truly do not give a fuck. follow for follow.
things i better have by the end of 2014:
- a better face
- lots of money
- many slutty memories
would you like some cream cheese on your beagle
keep your cream cheese away from my dog
my life changed forever when i found out the word “slang” was actually slang for “shortened language”
so slang is slang for slang
I DIDN’T THINK THIS VIDEO WOULD BE FUNNY WHEN I CLICKED ON IT AND BOY WAS I WRONG
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes
LITERALLY JUST PASSED BATMAN
No one’s above the law
Not even Batman
there was a big explosion sound outside and i pulled aside my curtain to see what it was but as i did so, so did the woman across the street and we both sort of waved at each other and it was nice even though something may have exploded
Everyone is so sexist and it’s so annoying “girls who drink are whores” “girls who smoke are disgusting” “girls who have sex are easy” and when boys do it it’s totally fine and it’s pissing me off because everyone is allowed to do it if they give a fuck
people who exercise in order to get rid of period cramps are the ones surviving the apocalypse.
Dog eating in slow motion.
this is really important
You cannot scroll past this